Soft skills like leadership, teamwork, communication are becoming increasingly important for the future workforce. At the same time, there are also the “nature vs nurture” debate about soft skills development. Till today, many have the misconception that soft skills are innate and one cannot develop these skillsets.

The truth in my opinion is quite the opposite. My work in Skilio have allowed me to understand that soft skills like any other skills can be practice to achieve mastery.

Remember the very first time you learnt to ride a bike? For most of us, it is a pretty traumatic experience especially when we were transiting from the training wheels to just the 2 wheelers itself. During this process of learning to ride a bike, I’m sure we fell down many times, analyze what went wrong and practice many techniques before we are able to ride the 2 wheelers like a pro.

Similarly for soft skills, it can be nurtured through practice and the key ingredient in this process is self-awareness. Soft skills like leadership, teamwork and communication are a set of behaviors that an individual displays in a given situation.

Think back to the last time you were appointed leader in a group, what were the actions or processes that you took to lead the team? Did you set a goal with the team or were everyone clueless about the team’s direction? Did you encourage everyone in the team to give their opinions or did you dominate the entire discussion?

Or think back to a time when you had to convince someone to do something for you, be it in sales or negotiating for something. What are the actions or processes you took to communicate your perspective to them? Did you try to build rapport with him first before showing him your perspective? Did you try to align his interests to the things you are proposing?

I am not suggesting that those actions mentioned above are the right set of behaviors to be a good leader or a communicator. Situations vary and what works in one context may not work in another. My point is that soft skills are essentially a series of behaviors that you display in a given situation.

So how does this help me develop soft skills?

Self-awareness being the key ingredient in soft skills development is also the first step in developing one’s soft skills. By being better aware of what are your behaviors, you can purposefully develop soft skills by practicing these behaviors over time.

If you are a leader who tends to make impulsive decisions, one possible behavior to practice could be to have a process that guide your decision making.

So how does one be more aware of their behaviors?

One simple way of doing this is simply to ask people around you for feedback of your behaviors. Asking your team members about what they thought of the way you lead or communicate allows you to gain a new perspective of your own behaviors. This however requires you to have an open mind to the feedback you will receive, as not every feedback will be easy to digest. Thereafter, you should analyze what set of behaviors worked and what can be improved on. Lastly, list out 3 behaviors that you would like to practice the next time you are in the same situation.

Just like learning to ride a bike for the first time, developing soft skills is being aware of your own behaviors and putting those behaviors into practice!

Head over to our website if you want to find out more about how Skilio can help develop your soft skills competencies. Skilio is a personal development platform that enables students to measure and track their soft skills competencies in the group experiences that they do in school. Skilio translates students’ interactions within a group into meaningful data points to enhance soft skills development in students.